Charades

I don't know what hurts more. Being played into thinking something existed or just being strung along with broken emotions. My heart is in a horrible place. Sometimes I wish I felt nothing. But then what would be entertaining? 

He made me feel so comfortable I could share my deepest secrets with him. He made me literally fall for him without any intentions to catch me. He already had that person to fill that void. I was just a temporary fix that would make things a little more fun than usual. 

I cannot hold my breath no more. I feel so humiliated by one and the other is just using me to his advantage. Where do I stand? Should I just sit and allow these two people to impact my life like this? Or do I just make myself happy? Life cannot be explained at times. We all really wing it when we think about it. 

I will never forget the disrespect I felt when guy 1 told me he wanted to delete me from his life. After I've been there for you supporting you, making sure you're alright, giving you motivation... This is my thanks. I dunno what kinda game this has become but I don't wanna play anymore...